here i am at the computer at 3.30am on the eve of teacher's day....somehow today's jus been a real tough turmoil for me....im even facing the prospect of losing my fren....im really that down, hurt and depressed...only one person could haf made me felt this way....but in this yr alone...2 other pple haf stepped into my life...filling these three emotions up whenever they're not there...
i jus hate today....why do i hafta act like it's my business???im sorry for hurting some pple...i din mean to...but i really dun wanna to see u hurt ever again...i've made a promise to myself that any close frens of mine would never get hurt in the midst of me.....and now i've gone to hurt someone....quoted from troy:'if i ever hurt u, i din mean to and i din want it'...
why do i hafta get so worked up???after all it's their life...i shouldn't be the one telling them wad i like and dislike....blame this f s*** on me....i jus cant speak properly....i cant be tactful...really sorry....
but haf they ever thot of me???there are 2 tings that hurt me the most...is when my frens actually say something that does not come directly but it cuts u deep like a knife...the second is when i see my frens hurt...and i too myself get hurt...true enough...i may seem like a tough nut to crack..but nobody...i mean NOBODY will ever know this emotional turmoil that i've been thru for 4 yrs already....can u take the burden of having the support the family???it reallie sucks....
so this isn't the best time for me to break down cuz it's nearing prelims...but this always happens....i jus wanna die sometimes....so that my worries will be flushed down together wid me...but until then....im sorry for hurting u esp...i din mean to do it....and im afraid that this may end up like wad i really dread...pls tell me no....pls pls pls..
[cry me a river]
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
D.I.E
The Dream Catchers